I don't want pizza that much.

Heather was gone at a wedding, and I had the night to myself. I thought that a pizza sounded perfect. The mall next to my house is CRAZY busy on a Friday night, but I decided to brave the crowds.

I walk up and get in line (if you can call it that. People's idea of "lines" here are a little too horizontal) and didn't notice the two men talking rather loudly in front of me. I figure, ehh, its the Middle East, people talk much more aggressively here. (Seriously, they could be talking about baby formula and it would sound like screaming to me. Maybe I am too sensitive?) Anyways, as I hear the conversation continue I realize its not two friends discussing who will pay but two grown men (and I do use those two preceding words oh so loosely) screaming at each other. And I mean screaming like faces so close they are squishing there noses against one another. Apparently one man thought he was the first to arrive in the "line" while the other thought the same. Screaming turned to insulting, insulting turned to pushing and at that point pizza just didn't sound too appetizing anymore.

...I settled on Panda Chinese, there was no line.

One little word; so many meanings

One of the reasons that I love the English language is that we have so many words to describe the same thing. It's not just a crazy person, it is a stupid person, weird person, strange person, insane person. Or take for example our idioms; the fact that "put up with" has nothing to do with "putting" things anywhere or looking "up" and "cutting down
on" has nothing to do with "cutting" or looking "down.". My students here just sometimes cannot get their minds wrapped around this. "But teacher," they say, "why not just have one word to describe one thing. Or say exactly what you mean? It makes it so much easier." We had a reading that was entitled "English is a Crazy Language" and it gives examples of ways we use the same words to mean different things or the same sounding word to mean different things. Now, whenever the idea of multiple meanings comes up in class, a student says with a smile, "teacher, English is a crazy language, huh?" I say yes it is, sorry.

But, wait. There is one little gem of a word that I have stumbled upon in Arabic that puts to shame most, if not all, of our crazy word issues. That of insha'Allah (God willing).

I have (through my own experience and that of my friends here) come to realize and understand that this wonderful word has three meanings that can indeed come to define it.

First, truly that of God Willing or "yes". "I am coming to class tomorrow and I will be there at 3 pm, Insha'Allah." Meaning, I am hoping and planning on being there at 3 and I will do everything within my power to be there. I pray that God will grant me success in this. There. Nice and simple. Basically, I will try my best. When I first moved here and heard this word and learned its meaning, I thought. Oh, that's a good word. Easy to understand....Until I stumbled upon its second meaning my incident.

Second, "maybe." I am currently teaching in small towns outside of Dubai. Teaching high school boys, mostly Emirate. I have become good friends with some of them and about 6 months ago we decided to meet at
a local water park. So they called me and told me to come to their city and we would meet and go at 10. Well me being the well organized, timely American, I showed up at 9:50 thinking they would be there soon and we would be off. Now, to my defense I know they are high schoolers but I assure you this has nothing to do with that at all. So they eventually showed up around 12. I asked them what had happened and they looked at me with rather confused looks. I said that I though they would be there at 10 and they said, "but teacher, we said Insha'Allah." I said, "yeah?" They said, "means maybe. We didn't want to commit to a specific time, because what if something comes up?" Well "too", "to" and "two" might seem crazy to them but that just drives ME crazy.

Thirdly, "no." Stole this from my friend Julia. Teachers have all sorts of headaches, but the biggest comes in the form of parents. This is the same the world over. Unfortunately, for unsuspecting foreigners in a strange land this becomes doubly true. Teachers ask parents to help them discipline their kids. Parents say "Insha'Allah"= Leave me alone and worry about yourself.... Teachers ask parents to make sure their kids are ready for school and have everything they need. Parents say "Insha'Allah." =Why don't you just take care of them once we drop them off to you?... Teachers ask parents to make sure their kids do their homework and prepare for tests so they can do well. Parents say "Insha'Allah"=Don't have the time.....Parents come to the teacher after their kid has failed class and ask, "Habibi (my friend) why don't you just give my kid a nice passing grade for me?" Teacher says "Insha'Allah"=no way in hell.

I have come to know pretty well which Insha'Allah people are meaning when they use it nowadays, but it still gets me time and again.

Guess English isn't the only crazy language, huh?