I don't want pizza that much.

Heather was gone at a wedding, and I had the night to myself. I thought that a pizza sounded perfect. The mall next to my house is CRAZY busy on a Friday night, but I decided to brave the crowds.

I walk up and get in line (if you can call it that. People's idea of "lines" here are a little too horizontal) and didn't notice the two men talking rather loudly in front of me. I figure, ehh, its the Middle East, people talk much more aggressively here. (Seriously, they could be talking about baby formula and it would sound like screaming to me. Maybe I am too sensitive?) Anyways, as I hear the conversation continue I realize its not two friends discussing who will pay but two grown men (and I do use those two preceding words oh so loosely) screaming at each other. And I mean screaming like faces so close they are squishing there noses against one another. Apparently one man thought he was the first to arrive in the "line" while the other thought the same. Screaming turned to insulting, insulting turned to pushing and at that point pizza just didn't sound too appetizing anymore.

...I settled on Panda Chinese, there was no line.

One little word; so many meanings

One of the reasons that I love the English language is that we have so many words to describe the same thing. It's not just a crazy person, it is a stupid person, weird person, strange person, insane person. Or take for example our idioms; the fact that "put up with" has nothing to do with "putting" things anywhere or looking "up" and "cutting down
on" has nothing to do with "cutting" or looking "down.". My students here just sometimes cannot get their minds wrapped around this. "But teacher," they say, "why not just have one word to describe one thing. Or say exactly what you mean? It makes it so much easier." We had a reading that was entitled "English is a Crazy Language" and it gives examples of ways we use the same words to mean different things or the same sounding word to mean different things. Now, whenever the idea of multiple meanings comes up in class, a student says with a smile, "teacher, English is a crazy language, huh?" I say yes it is, sorry.

But, wait. There is one little gem of a word that I have stumbled upon in Arabic that puts to shame most, if not all, of our crazy word issues. That of insha'Allah (God willing).

I have (through my own experience and that of my friends here) come to realize and understand that this wonderful word has three meanings that can indeed come to define it.

First, truly that of God Willing or "yes". "I am coming to class tomorrow and I will be there at 3 pm, Insha'Allah." Meaning, I am hoping and planning on being there at 3 and I will do everything within my power to be there. I pray that God will grant me success in this. There. Nice and simple. Basically, I will try my best. When I first moved here and heard this word and learned its meaning, I thought. Oh, that's a good word. Easy to understand....Until I stumbled upon its second meaning my incident.

Second, "maybe." I am currently teaching in small towns outside of Dubai. Teaching high school boys, mostly Emirate. I have become good friends with some of them and about 6 months ago we decided to meet at
a local water park. So they called me and told me to come to their city and we would meet and go at 10. Well me being the well organized, timely American, I showed up at 9:50 thinking they would be there soon and we would be off. Now, to my defense I know they are high schoolers but I assure you this has nothing to do with that at all. So they eventually showed up around 12. I asked them what had happened and they looked at me with rather confused looks. I said that I though they would be there at 10 and they said, "but teacher, we said Insha'Allah." I said, "yeah?" They said, "means maybe. We didn't want to commit to a specific time, because what if something comes up?" Well "too", "to" and "two" might seem crazy to them but that just drives ME crazy.

Thirdly, "no." Stole this from my friend Julia. Teachers have all sorts of headaches, but the biggest comes in the form of parents. This is the same the world over. Unfortunately, for unsuspecting foreigners in a strange land this becomes doubly true. Teachers ask parents to help them discipline their kids. Parents say "Insha'Allah"= Leave me alone and worry about yourself.... Teachers ask parents to make sure their kids are ready for school and have everything they need. Parents say "Insha'Allah." =Why don't you just take care of them once we drop them off to you?... Teachers ask parents to make sure their kids do their homework and prepare for tests so they can do well. Parents say "Insha'Allah"=Don't have the time.....Parents come to the teacher after their kid has failed class and ask, "Habibi (my friend) why don't you just give my kid a nice passing grade for me?" Teacher says "Insha'Allah"=no way in hell.

I have come to know pretty well which Insha'Allah people are meaning when they use it nowadays, but it still gets me time and again.

Guess English isn't the only crazy language, huh?

Musings on Adam Lambert

So as I followed up on an artist that I loved watching and listening to last year on American Idol (Adam Lambert) I was interested and not-at-all surprised that his first, read it again FIRST, television performance caused scandal. Now, to give him the benefit of the doubt, Lambert may have really allowed the "adrenaline to get to him" as he claims in his performance. Also, he complained that there is a double-standard in the entertainment industry as far as sexually suggestive material goes and its relation to gender. Janet Jackson flashing her boob. Madonna and Britany Spears kissing. Lady Gaga, being gross, Lady Gaga, etc.

Now that may all be completely true. But how can he be surprised in any way?! I am not going to go into the moral, should he perform that way, should he not, can we show that on TV, etc. I just want to vent at Lambert's surprise that people got upset. 1- You are performing at 10 in the evening. Kids are up. Kids are watching this program. He is seriously surprised that kids are STILL watching? He said that "I thought kids would be sleeping." What parents make their kids go to bed and decent hours anymore?! C'mon. 2- Look at where you are performing. You are not in the UK, you are not in Netherlands, Denmark or some other European country that tolerates that type of material. You are in a traditionally conservative country whose roots stem from even more conservative roots. A country that came close to impeaching their president due to his personal life. A country that roared and complained for a MONTH about Janet Jackson flashing her privates on national TV. You are performing in a country that embraces pushing the boundaries (rap music, Cable TV, Hollywood) but then shies away from those same issues a moment later. We live in a fickle, confused country that is as back and forth as Jeckel and Hyde.

I guess all of this is to say that if you are going to indeed promote yourself as a "on the edge" performer, don't complain about the backlash that you receive. Do it and be done. And if you are tired of the criticism, move somewhere else, or stop being so damn pornographic on national TV.

Off and Running!

Now that I have yet another way to waste my time writing about my life I will make sure this is an informative blog. I am now in the midst of our last Eid holiday here in Dubai. I am anxiously awaiting my sister's arrival today from the US! She is coming as Heather's and I Christmas gift to ourselves. Our wonderfully, wonderful job/bosses decided not to give us our requested time off. So, as upsetting as that was/is we are so excited to have my sister come and visit for a week. I will make sure to keep this updated!!